How to Trash Talk a Scorpion

putrid, vile, demon spawn - on one of the night sweeps.

putrid, vile, demon spawn – on one of the night sweeps.

If you live in the desert, it’s only a matter of time.

We say things like “you have to kill their food source” or “we spray” or “do you have a bug guy?” But we all feel it somewhere in the recess of our minds that our day is coming. That our minutes are numbered.

I’ll say it once, I say it twice (especially those of us who moved from CA)…we all live in fear of the scorpion sting.

We have all heard our share of stories from those who have lived to tell them.

We have all killed our share of the nasty critter. We’ve all had close calls. We’ve all left the security of our homes to venture into the darkness outside – ok, the back yard – to search out the little devils with a black light and destroy them with a flip flop, or shovel, or baseball bat or – you get the idea.

Yesterday, it was my day. My day of reckoning. I fought the scorpion and the scorpion LOST.

That’s right that blue light special went down! I took two stings to the back as he was trapped under my tank and then took three stings to the middle finger (oh, the irony you devil bug!) when I went to fling him off my back not once, not twice, but a third time! That’s when my husband promptly grabbed it with a piece of paper and…God rest that scorpions soul. (If there is a PETS organization that deals with the ethical treatment of scorpions, I don’t want any trouble here).

I’m not going to lie. It hurt. Like the dickens.

BUT I’VE HAD ICY/HOT PATCHES THAT STUNG MORE THAN THAT!

I’VE EXPERIENCED MORE PAIN AND PROLONGED SORENESS AFTER DOING FRAN (CrossFit workout).

IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?

I HAVE A SCAR FROM A BROWN RECLUSE BITE THAT SENT ME TO THE ER! THAT’S WHAT THEY CALL VENOM.

THEY SELL SCORPION LOLLIPOPS AT THE AIRPORT!

In all seriousness, I called poison control. They said that most adults can handle a sting from a scorpion. They suggested that I wash the area(s) with soap and water and keep an eye out for any major reactions like hives, unusual rash, twitching of the extremities or muscles, blurred vision or twitching eyes or anything out of the ordinary. I told him that I have young children and I experience those symptoms every day. No, I didn’t! Anyway, the stings themselves felt like small pinches and then mostly like my back and finger were asleep. Like painfully asleep. Like a million little pins poking underneath your skin asleep. It gets worse within the first few hours and then you just ignore it. You are also thankful that this is a distraction from the sciatic pain you still have after a month, but that’s something else all together.

Bottom line, I lived. My reaction lasted less than 24 hours and I am grateful for that. Yes, we spray. Yes, we do sweeps in the back yard with a black light.

We also live in desert and they were here first.

2013-02-13 011

Desert dwelling has it’s perks, but in all honesty the critters were here first.

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Categories: All The Rest

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